How to Use Astrology as a Personal Development Tool
You might say, as a Profile Line 3 in my Human Design with the Gate of Shock defined in my Incarnation Cross - my life has been a constant journey in personal development.
I’m an experimenter, a mistake-maker, a learner & improver.
I’ve shared before about how I wound up stumbling into using Astrology as a tool for healing past stories and finding answers & clarity in my future - but I’d like to highlight some of the ways Astrology has actually done that for me now.
Astrology offers a peek into the past
One of the bigger pain points, a huge turning point in my life, was my dad passing.
This happened on June 2, 2003.
I was 14.
When I draw out the transits for this date to my natal chart (meaning I took a look at what the Stars were doing on the day my father passed away to see how they interacted with my own Cosmic Imprint), I see...
+ Transiting Chiron Rx is directly conjunct my natal Sun
+ Transiting Saturn is in my 8th House, at an exact semi-square to my natal Pluto
+ Pallas in my father's Sun Sign, Aries, which was also exactly inconjunct to my natal Pluto
+ Transiting Moon ran right over my natal Chiron
+ Transiting Jupiter just a degree away from an exact square to my natal Pluto
This circle tells me right away that this wasn't a great day, or a very positive, happy time for me, in general.
This is a time frame was one where I was experiencing deep wounds that would directly affect my most prominent traits + self.
There's a strong indication here with the second and third transits I listed that I was going to lose my father, even more specifically, to addiction/alcohol abuse.⠀
This also triggered a deeper wound in my relationship with my biological mother, who still suffers from her addictions to this day. (Reflecting now, one of the first things that came out of my mouth when I got the news my father had passed was: "I need to go see my mom," who was in prison at the time.)
This presented an opportunity for me. A choice. Expand or contract. Understandably for a damaged 14 year old, I chose the latter.
Today, though, 15 years later, I can find more peace.
I've found many new stories and opportunities to cope with the loss of my father over the years, but I have to be honest: Nothing has brought me the kind of peace that Astrology has.
Because - call it what you will - this was a divinely intended story that was written in the Stars long before my father's passing. Before his birth, even.
It feels like there's more of a reason for losing a brilliant, warm, kind father at the age of 42.
And that brings me peace.
What a blessing it is to have another tool to use to reflect on these past traumas in our lives, to see “why” this happened in a bigger way.
Astrology offers valuable relationship insights
Another insanely profound personal development tool for creating happier relationships with the people around me has been using a type of Astrological chart called Synastry, which basically just tells us about the compatibility of two souls.
How can we best support each other? How can we grow together? Why did our souls choose each other?
These are the kinds of questions we find answers to inside Synastry charts.
Let’s look at my Synastry with my daughter, for an example to follow:
>> What stands out the most:
My Sun 3’ conjunct Mana’s Pluto
My Moon/Neptune 3’ conjunct Mana’s Pluto
My Mercury 1’ conjunct Mana’s Ceres
My Chiron 3’ conjunct Mana’s Sun
My Chiron 0’ conjunct Mana’s Mars
My Venus 0’ conjunct Mana’s MC
My Part of Fortune 2’ conjunct Mana’s Saturn
The birth of my daughter brought on a rebirth - in every sense. I literally almost died in the hours after my daughter was born. And beyond my actual life, every other aspect of me changed, too. My emotional self, my ego, my purpose.
My daughter’s presence stirred up a lot of deeply rooted fear in me - the abandonment of a parent. Of course, this wound resurfaced in a totally different way that inspired me to take more action in caring for my physical body - because this fear was rooted in my own mortality, and the fear that I’d die too soon and “leave” my daughter.
Her appearance in my life also stirred up the continually revisited childhood wound of desiring a close maternal relationship. I feared that I wouldn’t do things right, that I wouldn’t be enough, that she would crave more from a mother - something I somehow couldn’t give to her.
But truly, I see a lot of potential here for me to be a guiding force for her in the long-term, and vice versa - particularly when it comes to career and creating money. I don’t know if I would have ever gotten my shit together in my career if it wasn’t out of necessity of having a child, and the Stars definitely point to that possibility.
>> What naturally works:
My NN 1’ trine Mana’s Sun
My Mars 2’ trine Mana’s Jupiter
My Uranus 0’ sextile Mana’s Uranus
My Mercury 0’ trining Mana’s NN
My Ceres 1’ trine Mana’s Saturn
My Ascendant 0’ trining Mana’s Chiron
My MC 0’ trining Mana’s MC
Ultimately, I found purpose when my daughter was born. I’m living my purpose when I’m nurturing her and spending time with her, especially at home. Everything else flows naturally when I am taking it easy with her; in fact, when I do just that, and pursue things that are entertaining and bringing us joy (especially when these decisions are somewhat spontaneous) - she brings me a certain element of luck.
One of the things that stands out the most here is that we help each other to learn how to express ourselves more and more authentically - but I can also see how the first impression I give people might ruffle her feathers a little bit. She may wonder why some people perceive me as rather cold & penetrating when she knows me to be such an emotional, compassionate creature.
More and more when I examine our charts, I see the career potential we bring out in each other. This is particularly nice for me to see and brings a certain level of peace, because I don’t have to worry that my love & dedication to my work will upset her - as long as I can maintain balance. She knows my love for what I do and who I serve can’t compete with my love for her.
>> Opportunities for growth:
My Saturn 0’ opposing Mana’s Sun
My Saturn 0’ squaring Mana’s NN
My Uranus 3’ opposing Mana’s Sun
My Chiron 2’ squaring Mana’s NN / SN
My Pallas 1’ opposing Mana’s Venus
My Pallas 0’ opposing Mana’s Jupiter
My Ascendant 0’ squaring Mana’s Venus, Jupiter
But of course, it’s not all rainbows! There’s work to be done in our karmic family, and we chose each other for a reason.
While on the one hand, Mana understands my love and drive for my work; on the other, she derives a lot of identity through her connection to me/motherhood - so when I do get in those overload moments and fall into my own cosmic lesson/downfall of overworking myself, she does have the potential to take it personally. This, of course, triggers my own spark of rebellion - like #MamaCapricorn is gonna let a kid dictate how she shows up and feels expressed (through work).
We need a healthy dose of active communication - which works out because the way I communicate is exactly what she’s looking for from a mother - and our relationship should flow smoothly.
What’s interesting is that one of my fears was that she would crave a softer, more “crunchy” kind of mom like you see these days - super hands-on and making motherhood the top priority in my life - but what I see in our charts is actually that she appreciates my assertiveness and directness. She sees my soft side already; I don’t have do try to do or be anything other than who I am to be the kind of mom she needs to thrive.
Astrology helps us to feel more confident pursuing our Soul’s divine purpose & achieving real emotional freedom
There are a few placements that I like to look at for Soul Purpose, but this is a really great example of one of my more significant players in my Cosmic Design that Astrology helped me to really see:
“My kid has gone from ‘Powerpuff Girl jumping feet first into her plate of crackers and peanut butter,’ to ‘Wild child taking flying leaps from the top of her slide,’ to ‘Hungry baby shredding slices of cheese onto the carpet while I’m trying to do my job’ in the span of 3 hours.
Didn’t anyone tell her that I have shit to do today?
So I rescheduled some appointments.
Shuffled around my priorities for the day.
Ran around the house with my kid.
Played with her + took silly pictures.
Pulled out my yoga mat + followed a 20-minute flow with her running all around, pulling on my hair, mimicking my poses and getting bored and running off again.
I can really feel my 4th House Pisces North Node calling me back to Center today - loud and clear!
>> 4th House :: Motherhood, home, comfort + nurturing
>> Pisces :: Healing presence, spirituality, connection to Source, creativity
>> North Node (NN) :: A placement in your natal chart that indicates your life purpose; where you need to expand, what you need to embrace in order to achieve karmic + spiritual fulfillment
This placement has an opposite counterpart that tells us what we should be releasing - yet we tend to fall into when we lose ourselves and want it to be comfortable/easy: South Node (SN).
My SN is in the 10th House in Virgo. A tendency to analyze and become enveloped in and attempt to perfect my career life? Who, me?!
Today is a perfect example of what it looks like to truly embody my Nodal Mission.
To stay loose in my business life, to keep it fun and malleable.
To have more fun in my home; spend more time with my child; to find more creative, compassionate space within my home; to be more kind to myself and put less pressure on vocational achievement.
And honestly? I’m so much more peaceful, creative, and blissful today for not putting pressure on myself, my toddler, and my environment to “step it up” and conform to my schedule.
In fact, for recognizing an opportunity to follow my Nodal mission or to fall back into the South Node behaviors - my day/life is all the more easy, fun, and downright magical.